She called ,i was driving.
She called back , i picked up.
Before i could talk,she was crying.
i knew she was on treatment ,
i asked her what was wrong,
but she would not stop crying,
now i started getting scared,
what was she upto,was she alright?
what was she thinking?,
where must she be ???
i asked her again,please tell me what is it?
she said she could not breathe,
i did not understand
she said she had a chest pain ,
i was getting close.
she said she is going to die,
Ah!impending doom i thought.
i asked her if she was alone,
she did not answer,
she said everything has finished,
i said no it has not,tell me where are u.
she said she was at home.
phew i thought ,is auntie at home i asked.
yes she is ,but i don’t want to trouble her.
i said ok .just take your tablet clonazepam.
she said she did not want to.
i was confused ,what else could i do?
we were 700kms apart and i knew how stubborn she was.
she would suffer but not take the medicine,
that is the way she was.
never had i seen her like this,not even during the worst times .
she kept crying ,everything is gone,i’m dying
i’m having a panic attack she said.
she was getting better now.
i asked how she wanted me to help her .
she said u just listen. OK i thought.
she did not say anything after that ,i could hear only her incessant cries.
within 10 mins she said she felt better ,and would call me later.
i called my other friend in the same city immediately as soon as she hung up.
i asked to not tell her i called.
Because like everybody my dear friend felt vulnerable.
she felt oh i cannot be weak .Oh !no no no no.
I say can something be done ??
She got well in a month or so,we have not talked about that later on.
I asked her to tell others that treatment is available for mental illness ,
she said she would for sure.
the other thing that kept me pondering was ,what if the patient does not want to take medicines,
is there something else we can do?
or are we crippled?
many questions ,not many answers…