Torn apart…

Two worlds and she was one.

She after allot of struggle had finally become one with herself.

But now there were two worlds.

She had to choose.

She had to choose for the first time ever,as till now it was always chosen for her.

The ball was in her court this time.

She had to choose between two precious things.

it was like choosing between two arms.

Like choosing between two children.

Like choosing between two eyes.

It was tough .

She felt torn apart.

Torn apart yet again.

She felt like giving up.

Letting go once again.

Two worlds and none were her.

She decided to let go of both the Worlds and make her own .

Many people face allot of difficulty in Taking decisions, decisions of daily life or important decisions and it is taxing ,very stressful at times.

Having difficulty taking decisions might be a sign of depression.When one is in the throes of despair, there may be a pessimistic view of reasonable options and an inability to act and think.People want others to tak decisions for them.

Indecision can also stem from anxiety.

Anxiety of making the wrong decision, anxiety of hurting people,of letting people down.The fear of making the wrong decision and then facing the consequences is paralysing for a few people.

Indecision might also be due to obsessive traits , obsession for perfection , difficulty in discarding old ,futile items (hoarders with a thought that it might be useful in the future).

So,if anyone of is having incapacitating difficulty(a little difficulty and weighing various options is normal) in taking decisions,the first thing you have to do is rule out any underlying psychiatric illness.

There are various exercises and techniques which help with this difficulty which is taught in behaviour therapies.

One of them is the pros and cons list.

In which one has to make a list of all the possible options , choosing and thinking of the options creatively and then Making a list of pros and cons .

One is also suggested to make a long term vs short term list of pros and cons.All of this done with the aim of productive and more thoughtful decision making.

Whether it is due to a psychiatric Illness or you are just in one of those phases of life where you are standing on the crossroads,you have to go either here or there.This helps and ofcourse discussions with people you trust makes things easier.

Insight into the problem is the first them in overcoming it.

And yes if it is due to the mental illness , eventually with all the other symptoms this will also improve on taking treatment.

So cheers it is not that bad,reach out,you are not alone.


the essence of my existence…

my search for the meaning of life

51w6zAgrzTL._SX313_BO1,204,203,200_

Well, it has been a while since I have written.I was actually absorbing things before delivering.

what has made me write this??..

today I completed reading a book which is a life changer precisely and going through it has been a therapeutic experience on its own, it is like meditation, so I wanted to share the wisdom I have gained after reading it.

secondly, today is valentines day, yes, of course, it is not as important to us as it used to be earlier, still, some amount of limelight we can throw on it for old times sake and for the great memories it has given us.

what is so great about this book??

firstly, it is written by Dr. Viktor E. Frankl who was an Austrian (Jewish) psychiatrist as well as a neurologist.

But, more importantly, he survived the dreaded Holocaust.

Secondly, the book is simple yet very intense, each sentence holds a meaning one has to read between the lines, the lines which themselves are very meaningful.Dr. Frankl has very intricately and with clarity illustrated his extraordinary journey of survival, survival in the most brutal situations possible (though he has tried to tone down the level of brutality).

The moment one starts reading it, one is gripped by the hope he instills into the reader.

yes getting carried away while describing the book is easy and unavoidable for someone like me, cause at this instant I am spellbound by it.

but, not making it a book review, I would quote a few lines about life and love inspired by the book and other sources.

life ,of what little wisdom i have,isa gift,a gift that is wrapped up in various layers,each layer when removed brings in an irreversible change in us,each layer when removed has a meaning.But,the process of changing the wrapper is difficult,full of joys ,stressors ,achievements.The meaning of life ,differs from man to man and from time to time.every person is unique,absolutely unique,his abilities,his opportunities,his struggles are unique,so is his meaning of life.

EACH man is questioned by life at some point or the other ,their meaning of life,their purpose of existence.

searching for the same and trying to answer it helps one to look at the bigger picture and ultimately gives one enough strenght and hope to cope with a given situation.this helps a person to actualise his full potentials.

I remember reading a quote of Mahatma Gandhi where he says, when you are having difficulty taking a decision, think whether your action will help the poorest person you have seen?

will that was his meaning of life, that was his altruistic way of thinking.

the problem we are facing today is meaninglessness,there is no meaning in our conversations, no meaning in our attitudes and no meaning in our existence, the society today has become achievement oriented if someone is achieving something he or she is supposed to be happy.but, I think after reading the book is that life has a much bigger purpose,a bigger meaning.one should live each day as if it is a new life altogether and one can correct or relive one life again, better than one did earlier.My meaning for life currently and since the time i have known has been serving, serving people who need it, it has become my motivating drive, explains many things that i do.

DSC_0818

hope i have been able to put my point of view forward,I am still learning to write .bookreview


A living funeral

DSC_0673

The new year came and went,

he told no one but he knew that this would be his last ,

when a colleague died suddenly of a heart attack,

Morrie went to his funeral,

came home depressed.

“what a waste” he said.”all those people saying such beautiful things and irv never got to hear any of it”.

had a better idea;he called a few friends ,fixed a date and organised his ,’living funeral’

This is inspired from the book called “Tuesdays with Morrie” by the author (Mitch Albom) which was gifted to me by my professor and head Dr Panchal.

 

the idea of a living funeral appealed to me to a large extent,

the idea is analogous to farewells we conduct ,

to many ideas at the social networking sites like,testimonials(orkut) and the recent saraaha (or whatever).

what draws my attention more is that why do we need funerals,what i ponder upon is that man being the social animal is always  in search of an approval or rejection from others(positive or negative game) which is always preferred to indifference.

I feel therefore,we need to learn to be appreciative .

to express feelings,emotions,desires,opinions whenever given an opportunity.

to express love and gratitude before all the energy gets wasted.

you will get time to watch that video tomorrow as well But,u will not be able to appreciate your mothers food tomorrow,

you will get time to play candy crush tomorrow But, not be able to see the joy on your fathers face when u tell him you are proud of him.

you will be able to click that selfie anytime you want ,but, u will miss your husbands grin tomorrow when he is frustrated with his work.

you will be able to scroll Facebook tomorrow but ,you will definitely miss the opportunity of telling your sibling how you appreciate their BEING after they leave for college.

you will miss your friends

and definitely you will not be able to pat your doggie once he dies …

and death is but the ultimate separation,

So before we become ‘brimmed’ with regret  let us talk to each other ,appreciate each other .dedicate poems to each other,sing and dance for each other,

because we have very less time…